An odd flower in the concrete corridors of power

 

Lessons and learning from a powerful yet saintly bureaucrat

 

Some people have such graceful presence, even in the corridors of power and authority, that your dignity (as a common citizen of the country) gets enhanced by several notches after meeting them. They make you feel noticed. They put you at ease instantly; boost your moral and enliven your hopes just through a few words and small gestures.

How are they so effective without even asserting their power and strength directly? It's because they derive that strength and authority from an inherent core of kindness. They are aware that they are playing a powerful role on the surface--for some greater common cause--while the inner detached core of their real Self watches with amusement and playfulness; but it never gets personally attached to the play on the surface. I recently had the opportunity to feel the kind inner presence of a powerful persona on the surface.    

Apart from being a writer and poet, I have continued doing my professional assignments to sustain myself, while at the same time fighting court battles for what I believe to be justice and my well-deserved, hard-earned right. After more than two decades of struggle, despair had slowly started making its home in the armor shield of my determination. I was beginning to lose hope. To make it worrisome, frustration had started setting in. It was at this stage of my struggle that I finally ended up in front of the honorable Chief Principal Secretary to the Chief Minister of Haryana, Shri Rajesh Khullar ji.

What I am writing here is simply how I felt in the presence of somebody occupying such a high position. Power and authority can be intimidating to common people like us. We take it as a rule, so much so that we put all powerful people in the same basket of arrogance and ego. But even a rule can't sustain without an exception. And the honorable CPS to the CM Haryana happens to be one such exception.

As I stood in front of him, I faced an exceptional mix of power, strength and authority side by side with kindness, care and humbleness. Both things side by side! They look contradictory but here in this persona they co-exist. That's what makes Khullar Sahab exceptional. His authoritative presence will instinctively turn you towards obedience and hard work; his kindness will boost your morale and enhance your self-respect. Both things pushing you towards your best.  

He operates, as I see it, as the chief driving force of the Haryana bureaucracy. It is a very powerful, humungous responsibility and an equally onerous task. While waiting outside his office for my turn, I got an opportunity to witness firsthand the extraordinary range of people and matters lining up to get his attention.

There were powerful politicians, cabinet ministers, MLAs, mayors and chairmen. Then there were senior bureaucrats from different departments—IAS and IPS officers and many other senior officials from various departments. Alongside them were petitioners and seekers of justice like me, and other groups of ordinary people who had come with their representations, hoping to get their problems addressed.

Sitting there, I became a firsthand witness to Shri Rajesh Khullar ji's style of functioning. His schedule was so incredibly busy that even very senior officers and politicians sometimes had to wait, because he had meetings to attend, issues to examine and tasks to get completed.

I waited there for about seven and a half hours. But believe me, the wait did not pinch me at all. Just by being there, observing all the happenings, I happened to read an entire book on state bureaucracy. 

There was such busyness, such a pinpointed approach, such focus, such a bombardment of tasks of entirely different natures. One moment the matter could concern the life of an ordinary person; another could involve a powerful politician, a senior bureaucrat or a wealthy businessman. The range of people and problems that he has to attend to is enormous.

To deal with such different personality types and such varied subjects requires adaptability, quick understanding, knowledge, wisdom and, above all, experience. Just sitting there and watching people come and go became engrossing for me.

 

The morning outside his residence

Someone had told me that Shri Rajesh Khullar ji give time to people even from his personal time, before normal office hours, early in the morning. So I went to his official residence with my representation and some of my books that I wanted to present to him.

I found dozens of people waiting in the park in front of his official residence. A tense anticipation on the faces of people who had travelled from various corners of Haryana.

Many of them appeared to have lost hope elsewhere and had ultimately reached there. As one can imagine, people in such situations become disgruntled. They lose hope. Frustration sets in. Naturally, some of them were critical of the system and the government.

I heard many people complaining about various things. That’s inevitable where you have a gathering of people looking for their problems to be solved. But amid all those complaints, there appeared to be a remarkable consensus about one man – Khullar Sahab.

I moved around; as a writer, I keep my eyes and ears open. So here I was eavesdropping on what people were discussing. Grumblings, remarks, comments, frustration. Well it acts as a catharsis for the people to vent out their misery. But in spite of all the stress on people’s faces, there was a hope in the eyes. Because there was a consensus: 

Here is an officer who is an exception. Whoever reaches the threshold of his office or residence rarely goes completely empty-handed, because he always tries to do whatever he can to help the person.

One person was particularly critical of the government. But after expressing his dissention and criticism, he immediately qualified it. He said, in substance:

“But I have no complaint against Khullar Sahab. It has been my experience for eight years, and I have never been disappointed whenever I approached him.”

Another person went even further. He remarked that politicians sometimes do silly things that cause them to lose votes, whereas it is officers like  Khullar Sahab who actually increase votes through their positive approach, tireless hard work and willingness to help those who approach him.

These were not things that were told to me later as stories. I was standing there and listening to people speak from their own experiences.

Then his personal assistant came outside and collected the applications and representations.

Even the process itself impressed me. There was a specific precision and seriousness about the job. Absolutely no casual streak at all. The staff, including the security personnel at the cabin outside the main gate, were extremely helpful. They kept accepting representations even from the people who arrived slightly late. The usual time, as I understood it, was approximately 8:30 to 9:30 in the morning. Yet if somebody arrived at 9:35, I did not see that person simply being turned away. The staff would try to help. They would even provide a pen and paper to somebody who needed to write something.

Watching all this, I felt that such consideration and dedication in the surrounding system must ultimately derive its soul and inspiration from the central figure himself. It showed, to my mind, Khullar Sahab's commitment to efficiency while simultaneously trying to help people as much as possible.

Our bunch of applications and representations was taken inside.

About half an hour later, the personal assistant returned with remarks and notings made by Khullar Sahab himself on the individual applications and representations.

When he showed me mine, I was wonderstruck.

I had written an entire page about my issue. Out of that whole page, the master bureaucrat had expertly identified and underlined just two points sufficient to cover the entire issue, marked them in the margins, and sent the matter onward to the Chief Secretary for expediting the process.

Just three or four words stood there as the entire positive reply to my full-page representation. His single phrase standing out as the title of justice and fair play! 

After fighting for so many years, those few words appeared to me almost as if they were shining on the page.

They appeared to me like the title of justice.

I was deeply impressed.

 

My books reach him

I had watched Khullar Sahab’s interviews where he recited poetry with the finesse of a seasoned full-time poet, discussed administrative principles with the fluidity of water, elucidated deep spiritual insights about life and living like an ascetic and threw light on scientific concepts like a scientist. The vast range and broad platform of his personality created a deep impression on me. And that bred hope, inspiring me to try to meet him. Trying to grab my chance, I then requested the staff, “Can I meet the Hon'ble Chief Principal Secretary?”

They politely explained that it would not be possible because he had to leave.

So I asked, “Can you please forward my books for his consideration?”

They said, “Yes, we can take your books. At least we will put your books in front of him.”

I sent about ten of my books to the Hon'ble Chief Principal Secretary.

As I said above, I knew him to be a person of vast and varied knowledge, ranging from hardcore science to poetry, and somebody fond of literature. I therefore hoped that my books might add some substance to my application and hence to my cause. They would perhaps tell him something about the person behind that one-page representation.

A couple of hours later, something happened that I had not expected.

I received a telephone call from his personal assistant.

I was told that Khullar Sahib would speak to me.

I was taken aback. I was nervous as well because everything had happened so suddenly.

Then I heard his voice.

There was authority in that voice, certainly, but it was not merely an authoritative voice. Beneath that authority there was a supporting kindness. If you are sensitive enough, you can feel these things. I could feel that this was a voice appropriately authoritative for the responsibility he carries; but its foundation consisted of kindness, understanding and sensibility.

That instantly began putting me at ease.

I had been nervous when the call began, but the manner in which he spoke changed that. He said only a few sentences, but he spoke so personally that it did not feel like some hard and stern message being passed down by somebody occupying one of the highest administrative positions in Haryana.

Then he complimented me on my books.

That meant a lot to me.

He said, “You can meet me sometime.”

Then the call ended.

Those few words gave me an enormous boost. A revival of hope. Isn’t it wonderful how one’s mental state takes a better shape just by hearing some nice words! Words of appreciation coming from such a senior figure in the Haryana administration instantly made me feel contented with life in that moment because, more than anything else, I felt respected. And noticed. And that’s what basically we the common people look for when we reach high offices. 

I felt respected for the work I had been doing over the years; writing my books in complete anonymity; the time when I would devote years to my books with hardly any reader, forget about coming across encouraging compliments. I know I sound poetic when I say this, but it felt like desert rain to me because it is such a rare event in my life. I felt that my books had received recognition from somebody occupying a position from which he has spent a lifetime evaluating people, policies, problems and ideas. This itself felt like a big reward.

 

Seven and a half hours that became a learning book

Hoping that our interaction was still fresh in his memory, I thought it better not to lose any time. Opportunities are slippery eels. With my poetic amusement, I have had plenty of them going slipping from my hands.

It’s a battle for the less and less by the more and more.

A person in his position has to attend to scores of issues and hundreds of different personalities every day. Had I been lazy and postponed meeting him to some other day, perhaps whatever positive impression my books had created might have become diluted amid the enormous number of things competing for his attention.

A poet as a rational thinker. Good going! So I headed straight for his office in the Haryana Civil Secretariat.

Sitting outside his office itself became a case study in bureaucratic functioning. I’m an avid reader of people, situations, surroundings and happenings. I had a lively book to read. I kept reading it and didn’t know how time just passed.

It was enlightening to watch how things function in the highest corridors of power. I waited for approximately seven and a half hours, yet strangely enough, it did not bother me at all. Watching such influential people from close quarters is an extraordinary experience. In any case, I believe in learning from all situations and circumstance. That’s the primary fodder for a writer. Learn, learn, keep sense-perception open, stay alert, read the book of life. I did.  

The morning turned to afternoon, which too graduated into evening. How could one become bored when so many things were happening every moment?

The waiting area itself turned into a big learning book for me. So many characters to read. Highly influential people were arriving continuously. It was there for anyone outside in the corridor to naturally feel that a whole series of serious meetings were taking place on completely different subjects in Khullar Sahab’s office. Administrative issues were being dealt with gripping intensity. And in between scores of individual matters were being attended to. And among all of these were people like me, looking towards this office with hope.

I was awestruck by the sheer range of it. The task of fulfilling so many hopes. Imagine the expertise of the central figure in this churning of petitions, representations, complaints and public discontent. 

Finally, late in the evening, at around seven, I got the opportunity to enter his office and meet him.

“Sandeep”

The way he took my name—“Sandeep”—was so full of kindness and consideration. As if he was welcoming a friend, not a stranger carrying a representation for resolving an issue.

It felt as though he understood my position as somebody seeking justice for what I consider a well-deserved cause. There was something reassuring and caring in the way he spoke, as though he understood the wound itself; as though he could sense those clouds of despair that begin creeping into a person after fighting for a cause for a very long time.

Then something else surprised me. Khullar Sahab can surprise you in many ways. He has a vast range of behavior and words to comfort you, test you, encourage you, study you and much more. I’m lucky that he chose to comfort and encourage me.

He did not meet me in the manner in which I had imagined the Chief Principal Secretary would meet somebody.

I had expected him to occupy his high official chair behind the large table, with me sitting on a chair in front of him. Naturally, I began moving in that direction.

Instead, he directed me towards a more personal, private inner space.

I was quite surprised. A very pleasant surprise. It felt like I’m not a petitioner in his office; rather a much-welcomed guest. Now to maintain that personal, humane space in such a high office is no mean feat.

And there stood before me the poet, the philosopher and the bureaucrat—the man at the very heart of the Haryana administrative machinery—with such natural and majestic authority that his presence itself was sufficient to dispel much of my nervousness and inhibition.

Despite all the authority surrounding him, I found his presence remarkably kind. Power and authority lying at his feet like the weapons to be picked up when needed for official duties; just the necessary burden to be picked up when necessary. But the master bureaucrat always carries kindness on his impressive persona; it’s always there, even when he has to act hard and stern to get things done. 

When I look back at that moment now, I find something almost saintly in the figure I encountered that evening. This is, of course, entirely my personal impression. I saw somebody surrounded by the glamour and machinery of enormous power, yet completely unaffected by it—as though he was simply playing the role assigned to him without becoming attached to the role itself.

I could detect absolutely no hard edges in his presence that would intimidate someone meeting him for the first time. His words and light in his eyes were comforting to this stranger poet.

To me, he appeared to function with a remarkable detachment.

And every word he spoke to me was rewarding.

I felt honored that somebody with such an extraordinary administrative record was speaking so appreciatively about my books. He complimented me again.

I told him:

“Sir, these words of appreciation from the chief driving force of Haryana bureaucracy happen to be my biggest reward in life.”

Then he offered me some fruit.

Now, if such an esteemed personality asks you to have something, one should not say no! So I took a piece of apple and had a bite.

Then he said simply:

“Tell me now.” He meant the issue I had gone to get resolved.

 

From listening to action

I told him about my issue. He listened with full patience and consideration.

He immediately made a telephone call to his office and directed that the matter be dealt with as soon as possible.

But another small thing touched me equally deeply.

He knew that I had already been waiting for many hours. It was now late in the evening.

He asked me, “Where are you from?”

I told him that I came from a village in Sonipat.

Then, with what I experienced as very natural concern, he asked:

“Where will you stay today?”

That question has remained with me.

I told him that I would be going back with my friend in his car. Had I told him that I was going by bus or would stay in some hotel, I am almost certain—from the impression I formed of him—that he would have directed somebody to make some arrangement for my overnight stay.

Such was the impression his kindness left upon me.

 

My overall Impression of Khullar Sahab

The meeting left a very deep impression on me.

What struck me above everything else was the absence of any trace of hard edges, which power and authority easily breeds in we humans, in his graceful yet strong personality. Great power and authority can so easily enter a person's personality. It can gradually create distance between the person exercising authority and the ordinary person standing before him.

My impression is that power has not been allowed to make that dent in Khullar Sahab's personality. Power has merely been used as a tool for civil service. Power just seems a part of a job to him; because he is so much more in terms of knowledge, understanding and wisdom in deeper dimensions of life.

It is not that he does not exercise power. Of course he does. But he does it strictly as his job. Nothing more. His position requires enormous authority. He exercises power to a great effect that results in tremendous administrative efficiency. But the best thing is: He has mastered power; power has no mastery over him. 

He appears to use power rather than allowing power to use him.

He uses it as an instrument of service—to bring effective change into the lives of people who approach him, to implement the policies that the government places before him, to make the administrative machinery function, and to put forward innovative ideas.

He uses power for a purpose, but, as a person, my impression is that he remains beyond that power.

That is the essence of my first personal experience of him. A tremendous personality; a vast book to read to learn about personal and professional values.

Standing before him, I felt almost like standing before a saint-bureaucrat. One can feel such things if one is sensitive enough. I have been doing a lot of research on saints, sages and ascetics. The search has taken me to remotest caves in Ladakh. It was a pleasant surprise to find a saintly persona in the highest corridors of power.

I find in him a remarkably deep and brilliant mind together with a caring, poetic and sensitive heart.

And that, in my experience, is a very rare combination. Extraordinary is the word I would use without any conditions. Plain extraordinariness. So much so that it’s no longer only about getting the issue resolved. As a novice student of spirituality, meeting such a kind heart in the cold machinery of power system is a reward in itself. The lesser rewards, like issues and representations, of course naturally flow.

Postscript: This is not a mere eulogy entirely driven by the element of gratitude for the assurance of getting my issue resolved by the saintly bureaucrat. It has deeper roots. Issues will come and go; opinions will change; but this is something permanent. Whatever comes to me through my pen is Ma Sarasvati's blessings. I'm just a medium for certain messages. The issues and problems are just means to get in touch with such good people. The episode merely shows the inherent goodness in Khullar Sahab. Through my pen I try to highlight goodness in people. I have simply highlighted how nice it felt to meet him. The fragrance of humanity in this metallic world. We still have flowers out there. And there is still hope.