About Me

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Hi, this is somebody who has taken the quieter by-lane to be happy. The hustle and bustle of the big, booming main street was too intimidating. Passing through the quieter by-lane I intend to reach a solitary path, laid out just for me, to reach my destiny, to be happy primarily, and enjoy the fruits of being happy. (www.sandeepdahiya.com)

Thursday, November 29, 2018

Nurturing the seeds of goodness

The things which ought to be simply done, should just be done. Otherwise, their shadows linger in the mind. They grow heavier with the passage of time. This invisible weight is heavier than the stones we see around. Simple, harmless acts of appreciation, of enjoyment, of helping someone cross a stream are better done and closed with a full stop. It’s better for a healthy mind. Otherwise, they linger like conspiring shadows over our conscience.

A missed chance of being good will definitely cast a shadow on our mind. An effort to help the self in being good, on the other hand, will hardly leave any unbecoming imprint on our conscience for pinching reflections later.

Only goodness has a legacy and a future. Hypocrisy and meanness are just bad examples and leave repentance most of the time. To do good is instinctive for a human being, it’s however another matter that we stifle the urge most of the time. To be bad, on the other hand, is not intrinsic to our nature. It is wrongly reflective, a miscalculation, a tragic bypass of the instinct of goodness.

Nurture the seeds of the instincts of goodness. It’s a simple practice. It gives peace of mind, clear conscience and makes the journey enjoyable. Avoid it and you carry the burden in your mind.

Happiness: as simple as breathing

It’s basically we who repel happiness away from us. We don’t allow it to come to us, embrace us, take hold of us. We set it as a goal too far down the line in future. Some house, some grains, some accumulation of pleasure, some relationships, etc., etc. We set up goals as the preconditions for our happiness. And the goals keep on piling up, over the years, and set up a wall between us and happiness. And happiness keeps on getting more and more distant from us. I will set up a home and then be happy. Happiness delayed. And then I work over the years. There is no end. I set a goal to raise a family and then be happy. Again it sets up a wall between happiness and us. Relentlessly we just push on. Happiness stays thus a distant goal. Never to be achieved. We make it conditional on endless goals, which are never met, because it’s the destiny of a goal to merge into another bigger one. They never die, only we die. Huge immortals they are. In pushing for them, we die. Separated from happiness that could have been the greatest gift of life, had we not pushed it away from us.
The remedy lies in taking away happiness from the far end of our endless goals and keep it safe in our house, like we store some grains for the harsh winters, near us, in the safest part of our house. It has to be cut away from the trail of endless goals and ambitions and kept with the self, in the present. It has to be set free from any conditions of meeting some goal. It’s a state as good as being healthy. Just being and living for a day. Separate being from becoming. You can be happy if you set your happiness free from the chains of your lifelong dreams.
You should be pushing towards yours goals as a happy person, rather than somebody who wants to be happy in future after completing the goals. The goals never come to a halt, only we do, at the moment of our death. So we die unhappily, separated from the natural state of happiness which could have pumped our life with unthinkable contentment and satisfaction, only if we had set it free from the chains of goal-setting and placed it unchained from those unreachable spots in the future.
Let happiness be a precondition for our doings, not a poor outcome of our efforts. Do everything as a happy person; instead of doing the deeds to become a happy person. Happiness is a state of being so, not the specific result of some hot pursuit. There is only one way it can be availed. Either we embrace it in the condition we are in, or it just eludes us. Keep it with you while you fly. It will boost your determination to go far and high.
So the only way to remain happy is just to be happy, instead of slogging it out to become happy later. Fellas, kindly decide to keep happiness as a routine, let it take possession of your present, like a monkey eating fruits and the birds flying. All in the present. Now. Just being. Simply being happy. 

Thursday, November 22, 2018

The Regalia of Old Age

So he, the regal old man, embracing his age with fragile but tight grip, lives happily as the tail-end of a great life lived. He has weathered the tempests of youth: the force of beginning, starting and acceleration! And now the path of letting it go; losing the pace slowly, gracefully, receptively. The deceleration.  Slowing down with effortless muse. To stop finally. It gives him as much excitement as the force of starting. And then the final rest. Now, during the slowing down phase, his time has become slow, the world is a small puddle around his feet. He lives like in a dream. A slow-paced one, minutes stretched like hours, days like weeks, weeks like months, months like years. In slowing down gracefully, effortlessly, he lives equal to a dozen lives lived in the beginning mode.

He enjoyed the choices which fate sieved for him. Just grabbed his share. Now he picks up and plays among those things and coarse, discarded chaff which remain unwanted above as the fine particles, much in demand, trickle below. But it’s great fun, he tells with mischievous gusto:

“In youth, we just think that life means rolling in the sieve’s fine brew. But life can be equally enjoyable among the discarded heap, little malformed grains, sand-grains, specks and chaff. Now I roll like a child in the rubble of the past, which was once waylaid by the youth’s blast. It is now the precious wealth of my old age. Mellows down the rage in this haze. There aren’t any takers for it now. So I enjoy it alone, without that competitive drone.”

The old reveller, away from the fire, cosily lying at the margin, where the faintest traces of warmth touch his old bones before moving into the cold darkness.

The majestic slow down, as important and enjoyable as the headlong thrust of the beginning, the youth. The source, the beginning, and the slowdown, and the end. A cycle. Enjoy it!

Ice Cubes on Desert Sands

The cover page of my upcoming book...

Wednesday, November 21, 2018

The Voice Inside

The Voice Inside
Forget about the hoot and holler
emanating from the world outside,
And give an ear to the soft and murmurous
cooings emanating from the soul,
It has a soft and sympathetic
message for you only,--
your most personal message,
meant only for you,
Listen to these delicate chimes,
It’ll help you in finding peace in chaos,
In getting a foothold in the stampede,
In feeling rest, repose and respite
in the face of constant buffeting by the world around,
It’ll help you in breaking
the hardest of superficial layers,
which suffocate and limit your identity,
And put you face to face with
your  true self, your real worth,
Listen to it, close your eyes,
And pay attention with all your heart,
Just for a change,
don’t look far, look closest at yourself,
It’ll be as uneventful as looking
at a dust particle around your feet,
But it changes the universe for you,
You will have the biggest message
in the softest of whispering phrases!
And it’ll help you in finding yourself.

Saturday, November 17, 2018

My Mind, My Buddy

Be the seat of my strength, not weakness.
Be the seat of kindness, not cruelty.
Be the source of light, not darkness.
Be the source of energy, not idleness.
Be the source of creativity, not limited vision.
Be the source of love, not hate.
Be the source of smiles, not tears.
Be the source of happiness, not suffering.
Be the seat of optimism, not pessimism.
Be the seat of gain, not loss.
Be the source of help, not obstruction.
Be the seat of leadership, not just sheepwalk.
Be the seat of a better human being.
Be the source of a more loving person.
O my mind, my seat of potential, take my journey further.
Please choose the better half of all the dualities for me.

Keep reminding your mind. Repeatedly. Daily. With eyes closed and fervent request. It’s a very nice, nutritious pre-breakfast food.

Choosing the better side of the pair of our actions and feelings is as easy as flipping a coin in our fingers from head to tail. We are pre-conditioned for the negative end of dualities. The instinct can be broken. Just early morning practice is sufficient. It’s needs much as reminding the self. Repeatedly.

Wednesday, November 14, 2018

God by Chance

God is just an incalculable sum of infinite serious of chance factors.

Chance is divinity! If ever there is a force that shapes things in universe and consequently in human life, it is the chance factor. Random forces shape even the patterns that appear constant and infallible to us. Suppose you hold ten playing marbles in your hand. You keep these on your palm and take utmost focus to throw in a way so that you get maximum pieces in the hole. The chain of event that proceeds is utterly carried and pulled by the chance factor. Who knows with what balance and from what height, distance or tilt you decide to go for your throw!? You have numerous options as per the aforementioned variants! Then chancely you get carried to think one particular position more suitable than others. Who knows in what funny ways the marbles float in air? These can float in relatively favorable and unfavorable arrangement to hit earth in who knows how many ways to scatter in who knows in which directions and strike each other in who knows how many ways and how many angles to result in who knows how many moving away or into the hole?????? It is a long and endless serious of independent still minutely dependent possibilities. One conscious act of taking the marbles in hand driven by the intention of putting as many as possible in the hole results in an endless series of probabilities that work independently in between the throwing stage with particular intention and the resulting stage emerging as an independent result. The result is free, so are the numerous bits of independent realities driven by the free will of the chance factor. From micro to macro levels this factor works to chancely shape destinies and the way universe functions. In the fathomless domains of this chancy superquotient, we have independent units that recur in patterns with regularity to substantiate our scientific theories. These are but particular outcomes carried by the swift forces of chance. Universe is an outcome of some chancy explosion. Life on earth is pleasant coincidence, divine chance. See the dance of prince chance in all its charm around you and in your life and you will feel its superweight!

Tuesday, November 13, 2018

Tiny god with huge godliness

We may argue about the existence of God. But godliness definitely exists. It lies there in the innocence, verve, playfulness, laughter, smile and unconditional ecstasy of a child. Nevaan, my nephew, splashing godliness around during one of his godly moments...

Monday, November 12, 2018

The Mother

Just a few visuals are enough to tell  the infinitely long story of maternity and its multihued colours. A mother  is a mother,  is a mother, is a mother. Tough mother's training... follow me, but learn to make your own path along the way...he was just about to make it. But she pushed him back because he was following her steps on the snow which made the climb a bit easier. But then she knows he has to be a man. She just  cannot stop just as being the mother of a son. The little one then heaved his own way from the bottom of the precipice, planting his own paws on a new path as the proud mother looks on. Salutes to motherhood...

Tuesday, November 6, 2018

A stringed kite is better than a free flier

We can fly and rise higher only if we are tied to certain responsibilities and commitments; our freedom-lorn spirit tamed to an extent by social conventions, individual values, family setup, the sweet-sour tides in our offices, etc. But most of the time we find it as a drag on our real enjoyment of life. We just feel how great life would be without all such traditional stuff. But guys tell me, can a stringless kite fly?The kite flies because there is a string pulling it to higher skies. It also tries to negate the limitations set up by the string. It shakes its head in negation. OK! What happens when its dream to be string-free become true. It just takes a few ecstatic circles in air and falls onto the ground. Those free dives of its dreams prove to be its death dives. We are the stringed kites fella. We fly and rise high only because our destructive passions and traits are tamed and tied by a string. So love your commitments, your responsibilities, and your struggles for small small things in life.

Sunday, November 4, 2018

Antaryatra...

When the journey within starts...

Friday, October 26, 2018

Dewy fun under nightly sun

Swathed in the cool shades of a dewy night,
We stand brave with smiles and innocent delight,
When all sleep, we hold the beacon of love and light,
The moon is our sun,
When you will get up in the morning, you can't imagine how much was the nightly fun!



Thursday, October 25, 2018

The evening guest who won't have tea

Well, the sunrays are losing their pinch. And the moment they lose their hot potency, your skin pines for the warm kiss. Welcome early winters! Have been writing for my blog almost through the day. Was moving around to take a tea break in the evening. And here comes the guy, the bald Romeo who has shed his plumage. Hence bothered more about food than peahens. No spare chapati, his favourite, this evening. So I offered biscuits. He took a few unwelcoming bites. I tried wheat grains. Lo, here he is savouring his evening snack. Sad that he cannot have tea and be my tea party partner...


Some random non-offensive farts by the brain

There is no absolute truth. All we have is just a pliant, relatively swaying sea of fractional truths. We draw out our suitable share of tit-bits of truths from this sea to complement our sense of identity with the self, i.e., ego, self-consciousness, our perception of the things, our vision of the world and the people around.

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Women are humanist!! Almost perfect except one thing! Their humaneness crosses the zone of perfection and slightly touches an arena where bitchiness for their own sex starts in free flow. It is here the man's chance to appease his women opens up its welcoming arms. A man has to realise that it is more practical to say a few negatively critical remark about other women than millions of appreciating words about his woman!!

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In the burning whirlpools of the desert storm, some tears shed by a suffering heart vaporize and go high in the sky for rainy prospects. Don’t get senty guys, it’s just an airy oasis.

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Don't take victory for granted. She is a very choosy bride. She has her own, sometimes illogical, criteria to pick up the groom.

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A nuclear bomb undoes all other types of technical superiority in conventional warfare. Similarly, leaps in space technology will see a country undoing various technical superiorities in the hands of rival countries on land.

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To escape boredom, a man has to just extend his normal schedule; the same extension, which overlaps a woman's effort to tide over her boredom, turns her into a sinner.

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The best compliment for my book Faceless Gods was by my friend's six-year-old daughter. 
Struggling to hold the fat book in her small hands, and lost in the dense text, she gave the expert review, "Uncle has got a very nice handwriting."


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Truth need not be salted. Even in its bland form, it's more vocal than any well-peppered, politically correct, hypothetically safe and socially convenient cuisine.

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A day on the railway platform in a small town

A superfast trains rubles past without stopping, raising dust and many a wearied feathers. Rub of iron on iron. Pack of migrant Bihari laborers with their families descend from a not so swanky, classy train which stops at this not so illustrious district centre. Small people, they look all the same in their smallness. They carry huge sacks crammed with clothes, utensils, flour and rice--the bundle of dreams.

Linesmen are busy working on a section of rails. Vibrating sounds of hammer striking the rail chime through the cool air. Red cloth banner laid on the rails under repair, nearby a man in orange shirt, holding flags, red and green, is looking in both directions for trains on the rerouted spare tract in the centre.

Two students, going to Faridabad for exams, are fighting. Jhelum express is late. One of them is blaming the other for setting out late. The hoot of a fast train approaching. It's all rumbling iron. From the dense green foliage of the banyan by the platform number one, a squirrel is tik-tiking in some serious argument. A small portly woman clad in a dirty sari approaches the students. One of them gives her a coin and asks her to pray that they reach on time. If they get late, he will find her out in the evening and will take all her collection as a punishment. She is assured of the crowd where she can escape into anonymity, and shakes her grey, untidy, unwashed bun of hair in consent.

Platforms are a favorite place for those who have lost their minds—or who knows it is actually they who have regained theirs. A woman stares at a point for so long that you fear she will bear a hole in the ground. Smell of pakoras wafts with a pungent, oily fizz. The newspaper stall. A stationary kiosk. Under the footbridge on the platform, a shoe mender has his portion of the stomped world. Polish, wax bottles and soles define his boundary. A cargo train chugs past at a high speed which is surprising for her lethargic, old woman type bearing. The long trail of faded, beaten maroon cargo bogies raises a storm. Bored commuters, waiting for their passenger trains, look at it with jealousy.

Life seems on a mysterious pause before hitting the rails. Those who stay on the platforms rarely take bath, unless they get drenched by the rains--clothes, sweat, mud, gripe, spot and all--leaving them stinker than ever. A fat boy is standing, looking at everybody but still nobody in particular. They have their own world, those who have something to do with the functioning of the brain. Shouldn't call it malfunctioning, but ya definitely it works differently, taking them into a different world, unseen to the stomping majority around.

His bottom on a fertilizer sack cloth and knees drawn up to his chest, a man is taking deep draughts at a beedi. He is aged well beyond his real years. Looks 60, but don't be surprised if he turns out to be just 40. Poverty seems to be in love with old age. His gaunt features have acquired an unsparing penetration, a hawkish tenor, like he will jump into criminality at the slightest prompt.

And here she, he, o no he, she rather, both, comes. Many a heads turn. A boastful, proud hybrid, cocking a snook at the dirt cheap normalcy scttared around. The prince/princess of his/her world. She’he has carefree air, walking on two roles at the same time. Both males and females look at him/her with a strange curiosity. He/she moves with manly swag and feminine coquettery. The only emotion it creates in males and females is plain curiosity, even some traces of derision. Let's call him a he for convenience. He has a see through black, body-hugging top. His shoulders are masculine, in the manner these sway and swing with each step. Arms are also long, like a Greta damsels’ curvy one, but these are drawn tightly with traces of worked on muscles. He holds them like a lady of Grace. His chest is flat and would have passed of as a teenager boy’s prospects of a fulfilled manhood. He wears black track-pants having orange flowers on both bums. His legs move in a feminine rhythm. In rhythm with the swings of arms with elbows drawn in and forearms slanted out. Look from behind and you may think a slim female teen is moving. The despos may even get aroused. He is dark. His hair is also cropped midway through the length and style of a boy and a girl. Unlike, many transgenders who jump into exaggerated tones of sounding and appearing feminine, he has left his natural identify as it is, right there in the twilight, no light no dark, no shame no fame, nonchalant, lukewarm, impassive, self-absorbed. And he moves creating a wave like a snake-head creating a wavy ripple as it glides through the still waters of a lake. And most of them can't help staring, some even do with a mocking laughter.

The mother is there. Sitting like all the soot and grime has polished her misery to the extent of bleaching her bones. Her kurta and long skirt are soiled beyond the parameters of colour. Her dirty, torn at many places, dupatta is spread in front of her. A child, barely a year, is lying by her side. It is playing with a plastic cup, nibbling at its edges, touching it with its legs, taking its tiny tongue out. Wait, there is another baby, couple of months old at the most. It is packed, like it will stay safe during conveyance, only its face out. It is crying. She has put a bottle of milk to its lips. It cries anyway. Don't think she has enough milk in her bosom. A group of smartly clad college girls passes. The one with a backpack of books takes a moment out to look at the unfortunate mother. And adds to the coins on the torn duppatta.

And life simply moves on like it is doing around the globe and further into the deeper recesses of the cosmos.

The mammoth value of the small

If you can't so much as smile back at a flower's innocent, selfless offer of fragrance and beauty, I doubt your readiness and ability to laugh and roll in pleasure over the bigger boons of life. Learn to love and like the small-small charms of life. These are the building blocks which get you the largest palace of happiness and meaning in life. This palace of happiness never lies in totality. It merely lurks as the next milestone. We can never reach it. But along the way we can pick up little fragments of beauty, love and compassion which constitute the spirit of that palace of our dreams. So don't overstep a chance to light up your face with a smile. Don't miss a chance to bring the same curve of life on someone's lips who needs it. Happiness always was, and forever will, be defined by small things. The bigger things are just mirages lurking fakely over the horizon. They exist only to delude us so that we keep running and stampede over our little chance of happiness. So guys pick up your tiny fragments of happiness lying there around you. You don't have to run too far. Stay there. Smile. There are as many things in your life to be happy about as there are stars in the sky. But these are tiny, twinkling feeble with their ray of hope. These are not bombarding stars, dazzling the cosmos. Learn to love the tiny stars of your life, for they don't startle you. They just hold the tiny flicker of hope and happiness and well that's what life is. A small, hopeful, happy ray, gently twinkling, imperceptibly almost, for a journey from unknown to some vestiges of knowledge and awareness.

Honing the art of perfect 'doing': smart, suave and marketable

Need to learn the art of balanced "doing". But fall off the rope usually. Most of the time it's underdone, and the consequent target misses, falling off the mark, and more importantly the rumbling shadow of self doubt, reproach, frustration, helplessness and even cynicism. Other times, it's overdone, and its precipitous after effects, falling off the cliff with the overdrive, giving more despair than not doing at all, and resultant efforts to undo, to chip down the extra, and getting into a zone totally crazy beyond the extremes of overdoing and underdoing, landing in a zone where you no longer know whether it's a tragedy or a comedy. God when will I learn the suave art of just doing, finely balanced, perfectly nailed, expertly nuanced?

The Taliban of north India

Name the word Khap panchayat and modernists and educated in India will forget Taliban in tyranny and will start a cacophony of atrocities. Well, if you compare a firecracker with a nuclear bomb and get scared then nothing can help you. In December 2014, the law minister of India had condemned Khaps as unconstitutional bodies. How many social bodies belonging to different religions and communities will he declare unconstitutional that come under criticism on account of their deviation from the mainstream conventions??!! The basic mistake committed by khap critics is that they put these social bodies under the sledgehammer of their judgement on the basis of gross generalizations on account of few abstract cases. Obviously the worst critics of khaps are urban based intelligentsia who do not know how things work in rural areas where people are forced to take shelter under a common sky, unlike the urban individualistic mode of life where you need not bother about anybody around you. Rural ways and means of life, particularly in Jat society in Haryana, are too simple and too complex for city gentry to understand and comment upon. It is very easy to compare Khaps with Taliban, but all of us know that it is grossly unjustified comparison. Khaps are not judicial bodies. These are social units that cover the administrative loopholes in rural areas where people agree to certain social norms for common benefit. By surrendering few individual liberties, this system provides proportionally larger common gains. Had Khaps been that bad, dissent against them would have surfaced from the ones who live under Khaps. Quite surprisingly, people under Khaps are almost contented with them, while the whole world around them is crying foul. See any debate on television, you will have some educated super-conscious individual fretting and fuming against Khaps...and who he/she happens to be...somebody who has possibly never been to a real village where Khaps operate...damn funny!!

Vertical towers of prosperity or the horizontal spread of reservation benefits?

Something on caste based job reservation. The issue is politically so sensitive that just an off-hand remark by RSS chief was enough to decimate BJP's hopes in the last Bihar assembly elections. So nobody dares to touch the issue at the practical level.
The so called ‘lower castes’ have been systemically exploited for the last 5000 years in India. There is no doubt that they need institutional support to bring them into the mainstream. Not that the government cannot give them positive incentives in other regard. Reservation in itself is not the end. It is just one of the means to the end. However, in the present system of reservation there are flaws that need to be corrected if the real cause of Dalit upliftment is to be achieved.
I have seen three generations of elite Dalit families reaping reservation benefits to rise on the socio-economic ladder. Like someone’s father is a class one officer in railways. He raises his family comfortably ib Delhi, provides best education to his children. His son, born, brought up and educated in Delhi, becomes a police officer. The police officer’s children born, brought up and educated in the best set up get reservation benefits to get governmental jobs. On the other hand, I am surrounded by poor educated Dalit young people in the countryside who haven't benefited from reservation in any way. They have the qualifications, but in the fight within the reserved category they are easily beaten by the elite Dalit families. So does it really serve the purpose. The cause is served if the reservation benefits spread horizontally across the social strata instead of creating vertical towers of prosperity in the same families where the reservation benefits pile up across generations.
The solution can be: Let reservation be a first generation benefit only, i.e., the children of a reservation beneficiary will not be eligible for the scheme anymore. When a Dalit gets a job on reservation, he/she is supposed to bring up his children in a way that they can compete against the best. It will help in spreading the reservation benefits horizontally to the other poorer Dalit families rather than the vertical compilation of benefits in the already rich Dalit families. Unfortunately it has been the trend so far. Job reservation is supposed to provide more and more people with basic amenities of life rather than some particular families reaping the benefits on account of the already existing benefits.

Love the bad road of your life


Thank God life is not just a smooth road, taking us uninterestingly to a plain destination! Guys be thankful that it is pot-holed and bumpy. The vehicle of our life gets jolts and jerks which are in fact the lifelines for our material and physical being. It tests the vehicle of our being. The latter responds and this see-saw battle releases energy for the engine of our survival. Seen rotting, rusting vehicle chases in dump-yards? They re at rest. The don’t move and aren’t thus part of the expansion of the cosmic energy. One is alive as long as one is connected to the threads of cosmic expansion, be it a leave on a twig, or a tree, an elephant or a mosquito. It’s only the movement. You are relevant as long as you are moving in the scheme of things. So guys if your road appears bumpier than others, just feel the sea-storm of energy your system is creating not just for your own survival but for the common cause of creation and survival at the universal level as well. As a struggler you contribute far more to a great unseen cause than it appears on the common plain of our material existence.