Cracking the Code of Love

 Dalai Lama: “Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them humanity cannot survive.”

The fundamental structure of the seed of our being, our soul, is unconditional love. It stays deep at the core of our consciousness. It may not be tangible as a vigorous emotion. It is simply a state of being the way it is.

Ram Dass sums it up so beautifully: “It's not 'I love you' for this or that reason, not 'I love you if you love me.' It's love for no reason, love without an object.”

Quite ironically, we tend to oversee love and find it easy to hate. Little do we realize that the things we love are kept in our heart. The baggage of hate is carried by the mind. An empty heart and a laden mind is a sure shot recipe of frustrated self.

Come, let us explore the code of love. In the game of survival and sustenance, there is an underlying code of love, compassion and consideration. All the apparent turbulence on the stage of life is simply like waves on sea surface. Inside you have undisturbed depths. Try to read this subsurface code of love in things, phenomena, relationships and all other worldly scenarios as life chugs ahead.

Loveless Souls: Biggest Losers

 

Kinky Friedman: “Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.”

Doesn’t he crack open the little secret, which perhaps lies too much in abundance for us to give it almost no value like dirt around our feet?

The farther we exist on the periphery from the central core of our being, the more we get identified with rampant ambition and its instrument, power.

Abraham Lincoln says, “Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.”

Try it on someone who appears a replica of goodness and a cute bundle of niceties. Many times we make our fears, weakness and insecurities pass off as beacons of morality. Give power to one such guy and test. As Plato says, “The measure of a man is what he does with power.”

The urge to dominate, the ambition of power and the desire for prestige, these are all driven not by strength, but by some inherent weakness, fragility, fear and imperfection. There is an inherent imperfection that drives grossly selfish acts.

As Eckhart Tolle says, “Power over others is weakness disguised as strength.”

Stalin had very short legs in comparison to his upper body. When he sat on a chair, he looked damn funny as his legs fell short of the ground. We need not insult humanity anymore by even retelling the atrocities he perpetrated on his own people.

Changez Khan won half of the world and slaughtered countless innocent human beings. He was so insecure of his death and mortality that he went on rampage to forcibly plant his biological seed across Asia. By an estimate, almost 6% of the Mongoloid people draw their genetic line from him. But even this large scale cropping won’t give him peace and security. He was so scared of his death that fearing some sabotage he never slept at nights. He just went paranoid and one night ran out of his tent, tripped, fell on an iron peg and died like a stray dog dies accidentally.

You can add Hitler to the list. About him we need not say even a single word because speaking about the evil sounds like becoming evil itself.

I have no reason to feel that these characters were happy, content souls. Such violence and hate can only pour out of burning innards. The fire burns forever with the dry fodder of self-hate and self-reproach. The soul burns in it. Those around simply feel the heat. Pity for such poor idiots. Contrary to what they strove to project outside in the form of power and fear, they were the weakest of human beings inside. And their efforts to cover up that weakness took the world into whirlpools hellish tragedies. These were the souls who had basically got totally detached from their essentially loving soul, the biggest tragedy for a human self, and the biggest punishment also in surviving as living ghosts. These are glaring exceptions where these people completely lost their essentially loving self. Feeling sad for the biggest losers.  

They exist with only this much of lesson for humanity: How far one can fall if one’s soul loses whole of its essential self, i.e., love. One then becomes a devil incarnation. Even the smallest amount of love in a human being saves him/her from hitting the nadir of existence, i.e., becoming Satan itself.

So guys, hold your love in your heart with pride. And look up to Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandela and scores of other soldiers of love and peace. Look at the dark characters in history only with this much of a gentle reminder about hate and its destructive capacity because all of us have the virus ever-ready to attack our loving self.

Simply keep on observing your anger, hate and irritation. Watch it as a spectator like you observe the world outside. This much awareness itself will enable you to be in a position to take charge of your affairs as things start getting out of control. The agents of hate and malice strike you in total unawareness. Light the lamp of your awareness and you see the shadows creeping away.     

Graduate from Valentine Day to Earth Day

 

Lewis Black: “What I find most disturbing about Valentine's Day is, look, I get that you have to have a holiday of love, but in the height of flu season, it makes no sense.”

Doesn’t seem to make much sense to me either, especially when I get sadly comparative about the enthusiasm between Earth Day and Valentine day.

I sadly brood over the massive collective losses. It’s Earth Day, passing off like any other inconsequential day. On the other hand, Valentine Day makes a far bigger noise and catches attention. Media is full of it. People themselves are so eager to celebrate it. Well, nothing wrong with that. Symbolism of love and affection in relationships has its utility and importance. But it also shows how confined and limited, almost self-seeking, is our interpretation of love and care. Mind you, it might even be merely skin deep, shallow and funny. Most of us realize it very soon, by the way, in any case.

The best part of being human—our beautiful emotions and the awareness of good and bad—has been imprisoned so tightly that we just trample ahead with our tiny, boxed up, suffocating emotions, totally unconcerned about what is getting trampled under our feet.

We carry tremendous insecurity. Every fellow human is a competitor and rival to beat. No wonder the things that really matter, the issues that are make or break for all of us, the great common ground, hardly get attention. So the plight of mother earth is not that big an issue. It’s the nightmare that we simply delegate to the future generations to face and suffer about. If as parents we sacrifice our present to make our children’s future, cannot we just take a few more steps to be bothered about the future a few generations down the line?

There is a rat race of domination among all countries. There are elaborate geo-strategic plans to capture future for themselves. Plunder of natural resources, development of weapons of mass destruction, genocides, communal killings, and scores of the evils of modernity, where does it take us all. Mankind is certainly the most aware species on earth, but the most foolish as well. Of course foolish because what else it is to keep moving in a direction where, in complete knowledge of it happening, there will be fire and destruction. It’s as foolish as setting the house on fire, and getting full throttle creative about setting a luxurious bed for a night-long rest.

So the biggest stage—mother earth—is shaking and creaking under the hooves of the prudent-most animal on earth. What value the victory carries if the place you have fought for is bound to be crumbled to pieces in future? What does a luxurious bed stand for if the house itself will burn? Hope the earthlings realize that the biggest reason for them to feel insecure is for mother earth itself. Other levels of insecurities, and the consequent strife, confrontations and wars, come later. Even the fights of ego need a solid stage. What does victory mean on a dying planet?

Suppose the aliens approach us. And they will definitely some day or other. It’s just a matter of time. It’s creditable to believe that there are intelligent forms of life in the universe around. So once they arrive, won’t we be simply earthlings in the face of a common threat? Then these caste, class, communal and national divides will melt. It’s high time we realize that the great commonality that supports and sustains us, Mother Nature, is under threat.

There is a common enemy, environmental degradation, the result of our rampant plunder and greed, the evil spin off of our self-seeking bad habit. Let it be recognized as such and a fight launched against it. Let it be done before it is too late. Because the cycle of destruction, once it crosses the critical limit, becomes irreversible.

Save earth! Celebrate Earth Day with as much fervor as you celebrate Valentine day! Take your love a degree further by graduating your embrace for your lover to include some tree nearby. At least try to plant a tree, with due follow up during its growth phase of course, on Earth Day. Throw a bash for your partner. That will bring laughter around. Give mother earth one more soldier, a tree, to fight the poisonous fruits of our misdeeds. It will bring a smile to you.

These are simple exercises to help you evolve from the narrowly defined, relationship-squeezed definition of love, to reach the higher trajectory where unfathomable bliss awaits you.

Lamp of Love under the Nazi Shadows

 

There is crime and there is punishment. The crime, full stop. A lethal abstract. It cannot be reversed. It's a criminal act spinning out of hate, lust and greed, and all the wrong colors of the soul. Punishment cannot right the wrong. There is hardly any redemption. Punishment is a poor instrument of deterrence, and most often it fails even in that.

Going above the man-made instruments of punishments, we have the divine system of justice. For crimes, where the man-made system of justice fails to deliver redemption, we expect the divinity to set it right. But what of mass crimes? What of Nazi Holocausts, communist purgings, and religious, ethnic and racial genocides? The equation of right and wrong loses its meaning. These are the black holes. They suck any semblance of justice. It spins in its own gory world of hate and blood. No light of justice escapes. It's just a dark monolith, a crime. A massive wrong.

Forget about mankind's justice, even the wildest stretch of faith in divine redemption fails to get even an iota of justice. Does it mean that the mass crime stands unredeemed? Forever. Does it just keep casting its shadows over the present, creeping into the future, almost forever? Just hopelessly waiting to be redeemed. And forgotten finally. Or forgiven more suitably.

There seems to be no answer. But there is a possibility of a full stop. Love and forgiveness. It leaves the whole equation redundant. It nullifies the vectors of hate that were otherwise casting their shadows till eternity. Well, only till there arrives the ultimate checkmate: Forgiveness. And forgiveness comes only from a loving heart.

Take some time to read The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah. To me it sounds like a song of humanity amidst mass crime. A ray of hope for the lost. Redemption for the innocent millions who were wiped out because they attracted the greatest affliction of the human mind, someone's unchecked hate. A tale of a small lamp of love under the furious winds of hate and lust for power in Nazi occupied France during the Second World War.

France is virtually menless. Almost all the men are in prison. The women hold the baton of life. They have to keep love alive in their wombs. It's loss and loss everywhere. And monstrous brutalities. They have to hide fistful of love, humanity and forgiveness deep inside their tortured selves. It will be required to rebuild life after the devastation. All major destruction is caused by the criminal acts of men. It's for the women to pick up the scattered pieces and again make a home for the men, for a husband, for parents, for children, for brother, for sister, for everybody in fact. These deeds stand out as a eulogy for womanhood. Beyond blood and death, you see the sun of love rising.

It's a dark cloud hanging over, taking their smiles away. They are wives, mothers, daughters, sisters and lovers. But only in memory. The males who define them as such are missing. They have to survive alone. When they can no longer fight to save their bodies, they fight to save their souls. For future. For the victory of humanity over monstrosity. For their men. To give them fresh lease of life, food, shelter and the strong love of a woman, if at all they return after the war.

Forget about redemption. The survival of love in a woman's heart for her man, despite all the wrongs to her body in his absence, is far better a right than millions of wrongs committed by criminal souls. It is here that the question of redemption becomes irrelevant. Like a small lamp drives away millions of particles of darkness with its tiny flicker, the women of France keep the torch alive. They hold the beacon of hope, of love, of a possibility to restart life in the times to come. They keep their treasure of love bound by an urge to relive the moments that sound farther than the wildest dreams. In the backdrop of Nazi holocausts, they move silently, unheroically, carrying love in their eyes, hopes in their laps and seeds of humanity in their womb. Such stories help us in being a still better human being, a more loving person.

Such stories reaffirm the power of love. They teach the lesson of love and rejuvenation. Read more of such stories for they help us in recalling the true nature of our essentially loving self. They reinvigorate the feeling of love. 

William Shakespeare: “Doubt thou the stars are fire, Doubt that the sun doth move. Doubt truth to be a liar, but never doubt I love.”

Well, the great bard has no doubts about love. Lesser mortals like you, me and anyone around are safe in following Shakespearean belief.

Let the Festivities Seep in

 

Don't shy away from festivals. Music festivals, color festivals, light festivals, and various other religious and cultural festivals are the highway inns along the great path that life is. These are the pools for everyone to dive in: a big collective exercise to share the same emotion. Festivals provide an opportunity when your oppressed self can go for a revolution against the stress and frustrations of life. Real celebration of a festival may be the stepping stone to enjoy life itself as a festival.

Take Holi, for example. Basically a celebration of colors. Nothing symbolizes colors more than love. So if you want to move beyond the celebrations literally, take one more step towards celebrating it in spirit. Sprinkle the colors on your spirit. Waddle in the colors of love, care, kindness, sympathy, empathy, compassion, forgiveness and understanding. A human soul needs these colors as much as our skins pine for gulal on Holi. Involve your soul in celebrations also. Drive out the black color of hate and douse yourself with the vibrant colors of humanity and tolerance.

It may take some effort to better your worldly conditions, your profession, your job and your business. But it is really simple and easy to turn for the better as a human being. It doesn’t carry any extra cost. It comes free. It doesn’t even need time and drill of humungous effort. Just aim the pichkari at your soul. Let out a spurt of colors. Only this much. Job is done. It will drive out the shades of dark and gray.

Smile more. Smile over someone’s luck even if you are still waiting for your own. It will arrive shortly, changing your little smile to a huge laughter. Forgive your enemies. Look at them with a smile. They will be shamefaced of their dark thoughts about you. Feel happy just to be alive and healthy. The problems of life will seem just routine investments of effort only as much as you invest in climbing a flight of stairs.

Religious hatred has killed more people than the number of souls who have received real peace from religion. Religious divides keep on killing humans like in medieval times. So where is the advancement? The only way left out for humanity is inter-religious harmony. Festivals are the bridges. Abandon your hate and allow the colors to reach the other side as well. Put the festivals out of the barricade. Let the fun and joy be for everybody.

During Mughal period, Muslim emperors and courtiers sprinkled abeer and gulal from ornate balconies. It fell on the people of all faiths. Colored waters of tesu flowers sprinkled the spring-time festivity on the mundane clothes of a common humanity. It was Holi as well as Gulabi Eid. Festivities merged. Looking at the present iron-curtain divides, I wonder, “Have we regressed in our spirits with the passage of time?”

 Wishing everybody a very happy Holi! When you take a bath after the celebrations, please ensure you retain the colors of a better human being on your spirit. 

Same is for Diwali. Let the light starting from the tiny lamps reach into your inner being. Let your soul be a brightly lit grand hall of love, harmony, balance, equipoise, kindness and smiles.

And let it be so for all other festivals of all religions, castes and creeds. These are nothing but celebrations of the biggest truth about human beings, loving self. They just send a gentle reminder.